Hackney Empire New Act of the Year

Last night my friend Hilda and I went to see another friend, Giacinto Palmieri, perform in the Hackney Empire New Act of the Year Final. With a few unfortunate exceptions the line-up was absolutely fantastic, and I'm sure many of the acts will be very successful. With such fierce competition Giac didn't place, but he did himself proud. With his witty observations on the English and Italian languages and his deceptively low-key delivery, the audience quickly warmed to him, and rewarded his efforts with some great (and well-deserved) laughs. Having seen some of his first attempts at stand-up at Burning Man a little over a year ago, I'm amazed and pleased by how far he's come so quickly, and by how much confidence and polish he's gained since those early days. Great job!

Things that make me smile No.37

Another day at work, and one with a higher than usual level of complete numpties among the customers. The end of the day, however, was brightened by the appearance of a man who had come out of his way to bring us back one of our books, which he'd found on the tube. It may only be a small thing, but I don't think many people would have bothered, and I was impressed.

Books - Wideacre

I haven't read much historical fiction in the past. Aside, that is, from one summer in my early teens when I spent most of a long visit to my Grandparents' house working through a stack of my Grandma's historical Mills & Boons. I'd blame my skewed ideas about romance on that summer but I think...actually sod it....I'm blaming my skewed ideas about romance on that summer.

Anyway, I picked up Philippa Gregory's Wideacre from the withdrawn books pile at work on a whim, thinking I'd give it a go. Boy do I wish I hadn't. When I think of the things I could have done in the time I spent reading that book. I could have wormed the cats, cleaned the grout in my bathroom or stuck pins under each one of my fingernails. Any one of these tasks would have been more enjoyable than that drivel. Not for the first time I wished I didn't have the compulsion to finish every book I start.

If you're looking for a repetetively tedious plotline, cliched characters and  insipid melodrama then you will love this book. Incidentally, Wideacre also contains some of the most cringe-worthy sex scenes I've ever come across. This is not because they are overly graphic, or even due to the incestuous nature of the book, but merely that they are so awkwardly written as to induce a feeling not unlike a sudden sex scene on the television when you're sitting on the sofa with your gran.

Things that make me smile No.36

A man came into my place of work today. It's a large building full of books. People hand books over a counter, and we scan, stamp and return said books.
Man: Is this a library?

Things that make me smile No.32, 33, 34 and 35

I really do suck at this 'remembering to post' thing. Here are a few from recent days:

The men with steel drums outside Brixton station playing 'Secret Love' from Calamity Jane.

A fabulous party in Brighton followed by spending the day hanging out with my friends.

Walking on the beach and comparing girly throwing techniques with my beloved Paul.

Bumping into Matt outside the toilet with a stuffed toy tucked in his trews, and hearing those immortal words "Would you like to stroke my trouser weasel?"

Things that make me smile Nos. 30 & 31

I missed yesterday as I ended up getting home far too late to do anything other than fall into bed. I had a good evening though; first seeing 'Up in the Air' and then going for drinks with a friend. I picked the film basically because it was showing at the right time to fill the gap between finishing work and meeting my friend, but I was glad I did. It was quirky and funny, and needed only a happy ending to be perfect. I'm never quite satisfied with a book or film unless everything is tied up neatly at the end. Preferably with some kind of decorative ribbon arrangement.

Today wasn't a great day, largely due to the fact that I'm exhausted beyond all sense, but I did get to laugh at the policeman who came into the library for a surgery and ended up, despite his best efforts, joining in with baby rhyme time.

Things that make me smile No.29

Our work Christmas meal got cancelled due to snow, then I missed the replacement meal because I was ill, but I finally got my secret santa present today. Penguin hot water bottle! I love penguins.

Things that make me smile No.28

I finally got around to watching the episodes of Cranford that were on over Christmas. Period dramas are great. I've been pretty stressed over the last week or so, but a few hours of Judi Dench in a bonnet and I feel much better.

Things that make me smile No.27

Rock 'n Rose jewellery. Every time I visit this site I find so many things I want. On this occasion the top of my list is occupied by this pocket watch. I don't currently have a wristwatch, can't find one I like and am always losing track of time when I'm shelving in the library, so it would actually be a very practical purchase. Or that's what the frivolous part of my brain is trying to tell the sensible part. Sadly the sensible part insists we can't afford it.
 I also adore the twenties-style feather headbands and pretty pink beaded bracelet.

Books - Possession

I can't decide whether I enjoyed this book or am intensely irritated by it. It is a book of halves, with two romances running parallel to one aother; one historical and one modern. The problem I had in reading it is that I found one pair of characters thoroughly engaging, while the other pair was strangely unsympathetic and tedious. I caught myself plodding through the historical portions, which came to feel increasingly like a weak storyline in a soap opera, flicking ahead through the pages to find out how much more I had to read before the modern part resumed. Having said that, the bits that are good really are very good, and some of the poetry and stories which Byatt writes on behalf of La Motte and Ash are utterly beautiful and enchanting. It's just unfortunate that the characters' motivation and dialogue is weak. The modern pairing of Maud and Roland is much stronger, although the caricatured and one-dimensional supporting cast is both distracting and annoying. On the whole I'm glad I persisted with it, but don't think I would fight my way through it a second time.

Things that make me smile No.26

This owl print from strawberryluna's etsy shop. I love the fat, awkward looking owls and the stark branches. Plus the colours would go beautifully in my siting room. Me want.

Things that make me smile No.25

Boss: She's the kind of person who swears in facebook statuses
Me: I swear in facebook statuses sometimes. What's wrong with that?
Boss: Yeah, but she's all respectable, and you're...whatever you are.

Things that make me smile No.24

Yesterday I forgot to post, but did have a lovely encounter when work sent me with a colleague to read to some kids at the local school. We'd been reading a book which had a fox in it, so were asking the children whether they'd ever seen a fox. One little blonde cherub of a boy stuck up his hand.
"I saw a fox but it was a really, really, very long time ago, back when I was four"
"And how old are you now?" My colleague asked him
"Five"

Things that make me smile No.23

This morning I discovered that it's quite hard to knit when there's a kitten hanging on to the end of your knitting needle. For the sake of cliche I'd have preferred her to chase the ball of yarn, but apparently she'd rather chew a wooden stick. Honestly girl, have you no respect for narrative convention?

Things that make me smile No.22

Urgh. It's been another pretty awful day today and, once again, I'm struggling for something that made me smile. My new bath towels arrived in the post. I think that's about as good as it's going to get!

Things that make me smile No.21

I spent today helping to look after my friend's grandson, as his mum is currently too ill to deal with him on her own. He was a joy; a sunny-natured little dumpling of a thing, who was a pleasure to play with, but the highlight of the day was hearing his mum tell someone on the phone that she couldn't have managed without me. Sappy as it sounds, there's something so nice in being able to be of use to somebody when they need help.

Things that make me...oh who am I kidding!

Nothing made me smile today. I fell, I'm in pain and I'm grumpy. Maybe I'll post two smiles tomorrow to make up for it. Maybe I'll still be grumpy and in pain. Who knows?

Ice ain't nice

Yesterday I mentioned the icy state of my front path. Apparently I have the memory of a goldfish though, as today I went trotting merrily down it to put the rubbish out, in fine disregard of the hazard it presented. Inevitably I went flying just as I reached the bottom of the steps, cracking my head and cutting my ear on the brick wall beside them, and doing something decidedly unpleasant to my ankle. I've had to cancel my plans for the evening, and am now ensconced on the sofa with, I hope, everything I need within reach. I must remember not to drink too much though, as getting up the stairs to the bathroom will involve crawling.

Things that make me smile No.20

Early this morning somebody knocked on my front door to ask me if I had any grit. Why on earth would I have grit? Is there some sort of conspiracy theory going round, accusing individuals of hoarding grit in their homes? And if so, why would I be suspected? My own front path is still thick with snow and ice. Surely if I had grit I would have used it. The sheer stupidity of people never fails to make me laugh.

Things that make me smile No.19

I have a bit of a thing for cameos, particularly the traditional Victorian silhouettes. I have a handful of reproduction brooches and necklaces but would love to have an original one day, or even (dream of dreams) one made as a representation of myself. Perhaps when I win the lottery.

Things that make me smile No.18

On the tube on the way home today there was a man in the corner, fast asleep. Not so unusual really, except that I have never in my life heard anyone snore so loudly! He sounded like a truffle hog in a vat of treacle. Everyone in the carriage was enticed into breaking the cardinal rule of tube travel and actually making eye contact. We all giggled away, while one elderly lady was laughing so hard that I could only hope she'd remembered her tena lady.

Snowday (and smile 17)

I made an heroic effort to get into work today; struggling up the hill and spending about 45 minutes waiting for a bus which would take me past the suspended part of the Northern line. The bus never materialised though, and I was forced to call in snowbound. This was fairly annoying as, being a temp, I don't get paid for snow days. I cheered up pretty swiftly though, when my lovely local friend suggested we venture out to play in the winter wonderland. We decided to build a snow-woman and, after a fag and a quick nip from the hipflask, set to work on construction. We started out with a fairly standard snowman shape, but our sense of aesthetic nicety was offended by her bulbous deformity, so we set about whittling her into a more agreeable form. After that it's possible that we got a little over-excited. A rummage through our handbags turned up a hat, a necklace and - perhaps most oddly for a snowman - make-up, all of which were duly applied to our emerging masterpiece. When finished she acquired a poise and regality never before seen in snowkind, and we christened her Ekaterina, our Russian snow princess. Unfortunately her class was not appreciated by the toothless old man who requested to have his photo taken with her, and then proceeded to grope her bosom. Tsk.
We were truly sad to leave her, knowing the damage that can be done to a vulnerable snow princess by passing kids, dogs or chavs. Alas though, twas getting late and the pub beckoned.
Farewell fair Ekaterina! We leave you with a kiss and wish you a slow, torturous death by melting.

Things that make me smile No.16

I just picked up my phone to find a series of missed calls from my mother. We're forecast heavy snow here tomorrow, and it turns out all she wanted was to remind me to put a toothbrush and a clean pair of knickers in my handbag in case I get stranded and can't get home. Apparently it doesn't matter if I end up spending the night in a doorway somewhere, so long as I have fresh undies and clean teeth!

Books - Temeraire

I have a confession to make. As a library worker I really ought to know better but, more often than not, I judge books by their covers. In fact, I wholeheartedly reject the idea that one shouldn't. Millions of pounds are spent in the publishing industry on ensuring that book covers appeal to the target audience of the book. You can almost always tell at least the genre of a book by its appearance, so why not use that as a primary indication of whether it's worth the effort of reading the blurb?

I picked up Temeraire in my library because the bold cover caught my eye, then read the blurb and thought 'Well you can't go wrong with a dragon, can you?'. Actually you probably can, but Novik doesn't. I found myself becoming genuinely attatched to the wise but childlike Temeraire, and loved the fond relationship between him and his rider. I was very miffed when I went back to the shelf for the next installment, which had been sitting right there when I took the first book, only to find that some inconsiderate member of the public had had the cheek to withdraw it. Disgraceful behaviour.

Things that make me smile No.15

I can't imagine why, but every picture in the hotel I stayed in last night was hung at a ninety degree rotation from its proper orientation.

Teaching

In all the thinking I've been doing about the last decade there is one incident, which occured near its beginning, that keeps coming to mind. When I was 15 I got into an argument with two boys in my English class after they shouted out some truly awful remarks about a kid a few years below us, who was disabled. I was removed from the class by the teacher, who proceeded to give me a little talk. She told me that I needed to learn not to take things so personally. There are, she said, some things in this world which we just can't change, so there's no point in upsetting yourself over them. Apparently I would make life a lot easier on myself if I just took a step back. I was given a detention for disrupting the class, while the boys in question weren't even reprimanded. I'd previously had a lot of respect for this teacher, but that day I lost every scrap of it. I couldn't believe that I was being told to sit back and watch bigotry and cruelty take place without even speaking out, let alone trying to stop it. I'm proud to say that I never stopped taking things like that personally. Watching the news still quite often makes me cry at the things that people are prepared to do to other people, and I will always argue with someone who makes a remark of that type. Perhaps I do make my life a little harder by reacting to things so strongly, but I'd rather that than be the kind of person who just doesn't care. That teacher could have done a lot of damage that day, but luckily all she did was make me despise her.

Things that make me smile No.14

I really shouldn't laugh but, after watching the kitten tentatively investigating a lit candle last night, I've just noticed that she's managed to frazzle off her eyebrows. Daft moggy.

Things that make me smile No.13

Looking through my reading list for the new semester today I found that my - admittedly slightly excessive - book collection could actually furnish me with all but one item on the list. I find it frustrating spending money on books that I don't actually want, so this is damn good news.

Happy New Year

A new year, a new decade. Frankly I'm glad to see the back of the last one. Large portions of it really did suck beyond the telling of it although, thankfully, it did pick up towards the end. I always seem to get a bit maudlin about New Year; probably because I focus too much on what's gone wrong over the course of the year, instead of on what I've acheived. This was supposed to lead into a celebration of the year's acheivements, but all I can come up with is 'I got a job', and the cynical part of my brain responds to that with 'Yes, you did. In November. After being involuntarily unemployed since May. Whoop-de-do. Would you like me to list all the things you screwed up this year? I can you know'.
I don't like that part of my brain. It's mean to me.

I'm going to attempt to prove it wrong though. This year will be the year I graduate from university. It will also, I hope, be the year when I get a permanent, full-time job, and the year when I move to a place of my own, which nobody can tell me not to decorate or fill with cats.

These are not resolutions. They're just things that I hope will happen but which are pretty much out of my control. I have made a resolution however.

I Will Make a Fool of Myself!

I worry way too much about what people think of me. I don't dance because I'm bad at it and worry people will laugh at me. I try not to talk too much around people I don't know well in case I say something wrong or odd and they laugh at me. Do you see the theme emerging? Well stuff it. Does it really matter if people laugh at me? Can it possibly be worse than constantly worrying about the potential for it happening? I sincerely doubt it. So this year I'm going to dance badly, I'm going to say the odd things, I'm going to wear what I like, do what my impulses tell me and generally pull the poker out of my rear end. It promises to be great fun!
In my first act of not caring what people think of me, I'm going to put a link to this blog where my friends might actually see it and thereby risk boring them to tears. Sorry kids.

Things that make me smile Nos. 8, 9, 10, 11 and 12

Massive fail on the whole 'I'm going to post every day' plan. Since I've missed 4 days here is a bumper crop of things that have made me smile:

28th - My parents took me to a folk night at  local pub. Also in attendence was a young girl who, when we happened to be in the ladies at the same time, proceeded to interrogate me about myself from the next cubicle while I tried to wee. She then supervised me washing my hands, assuring me that it was ok to use the hand-drier; it wouldn't hurt me.

29th - I had a truly hellish train journey back from Derby, culminating in the train being terminated on the wrong side of London after the train in front caught fire (no passengers on board thankfully). In this whole debacle there was only one thing that made me smile: the waif of a teenage girl who valiantly insisted on helping me carry my enormous suitcase up a long flight of stairs even though it probably weighed more than she did.

30th - A hunt through my wardrobe established that I was able to put together a 1910 outfit for New Years Eve at just one day's notice and without spending a penny. I realised that, due to my tendency to accrue odd clothing for Burning Man events, I can probably fashion an outfit for most themes from things I already own.

31st - Just a wonderful party! So many people had put such an effort into their costumes. I loved running the resolution booth with Karla, where we helped people to find their new years resolutions, I loved having my portrit drawn, getting to hold a python, bumping into friends I hadn't known would be there, and the fact that the tubes were running late so I had a hassle-free journey home.

1st - I've spent today on the sofa nursing a hangover so will have to clutch at straws and offer up the flashback I had this morning to our attempts to get dressed and made-up in a corridor before the party last night. Strangely there was a man who kept taking photographs of us (we were dressed by then thankfully). Even more strangely, the man turned out not to be the official photographer as we'd thought, but the juggler. Hmm.