Special report

The cat-induced marble jar crash of 16/01 was one of the most catastrophic events of the last fortnight, and its effects are still being felt to this day. In the aftermath of the tragedy, minute fragments of broken glass were spread throughout the surrounding environs. The likelihood is that the full extent of the damage will not be known for some time but, already, it is becoming clear that there will be tough times ahead. Just yesterday, small slivers were located within a sealed tube of moisturiser, through the high-tech detection method of inadvertently grinding them into my forehead.