Where there's smoke there's fire

I picked up smoking sort of by accident during the course of one too many drunken evenings bumming the occasional ciggie. I was twenty, I think. Maybe twenty-one. Well past the age of peer pressure, and had only ever smoked a couple of cigarettes during my teens, to try it, and didn't like it! One of my school friends, who had smoked for many years, and whose lingering cigarette whiff was the reason my mother regularly accused me of doing so, couldn't quite believe the stupidity of my taking it up after so resolutely abstaining during my most impressionable years. As time passed, buying the odd pack here and there turned into a regular, if minimal, habit, which increased beyond all sense about a year ago, when I began working in an office where half of us smoke, and regular smoking breaks are tolerated.

Then two things happened in quick succession. Firstly, I burned my eyeball. A gust of wind picked up, snatched a burning chunk from the end of my cigarette and deposited it squarely in my left eye. I know. It's horrific. If that didn't make you slam your eyelid shut and say 'gah!', then I'm telling it wrong. Then, that evening, I went for a drink with some friends, one of whom recently lost his father to a smoking induced illness, and got into a conversation on the topic. It turns out there is nothing you can say in that situation to justify your decision to keep smoking. The little bleats of "But I enjoy smoking", "But it relaxes me", "But it's not like I'm planning on smoking for ever" sound indescribably pathetic when placed against the enormity of a friend's raw grief. He was pretty hard on me for a while. For instance......
S: It was all very well for my dad; at least he had someone to look after him at the end......
M: Whereas I'm going to die alone?
S: Not if you stop smoking!
Harsh, no? But when he looked at me all sadly and said "I'm sorry. I don't really think you're going to die alone. But you're my friend, and I want to protect you", I just thought.......Oh crap......I don't really have a choice here, do I? His concern (and skilful grasp of emotional blackmail) had already convinced his girlfriend, also one of my best friends, to quit, and now another victory was his.

That was two weeks ago. I'm doing well so far although, granted, I've been far too ill to want to smoke for about four days of that. Still....not bad going I think!