This is where I talk about underwear

A while ago I bought some underwear from a certain department store, renowned for reliable examples of such items. When putting my purchases in my bag, the sales lady somehow managed to add a multipack of knickers, several sizes too small for me. On discovering this when I got home, I chucked them to the back of a drawer, intending to pass them on to a slimmer friend at some point. I never got around to this but, yesterday, finding myself very behind on laundry and entirely sans knickers, I decided that too-small pants were a better option than a) no pants, or b) dirty pants. This turned out to be an error of judgement which would lead to me spending the day squirming in my seat as unforgiving, size ten elastic cut into my size sixteen flesh. I confided my discomfort to a colleague/friend, but sadly never quite found the time to take up her suggestion and smuggle a pair of scissors to the ladies to make some swift tailoring alterations. Even more sadly, I still haven't had time to put any washing on, so will most likely be forced to fish out another pair tomorrow. Sad times.